Sad but true. I cannot even remember when was the last time my family bought a cake on my birthday and celebrated. All I remember is me reminding them on every 29th April morning that ‘It’s my birthday today’.
It is really hard to digest the truth and sadness behind the feeling of being lonely on your birthday. Always ends up as usual day. I expected some birthday wishes, but they never did. And got wishes from the least expected and that was really fun. It was a kind of surprise!
First wish was from Zain (my imaginary friend-sounds childish but it’s really awesome to have one). He wished me, which was expected. Then in the midnight nearing to almost 1:30 am or something I went to the dining room for drinking water and I found my mother still awake in her room. She was in her bed but not asleep. It was dark so she asked ‘Is that you?’ I said ‘Yeah it’s me’
‘Happy birthday dear’ She wished me. I was surprised and so happy that I left my room with two pillows and bed sheet in my hands, went to my mother’s room and slept with her hugging her so tight. It was so good. She even kissed me on my forehead when I hugged her.
Today morning, when I signed in to my g-mail and then when I opened Google, I found Google image in birthday cakes and it wished ‘ME’ ‘Happy birthday Uma’ which gave me a mini heart attack for a sec.
Then got wishes from Wattpad.
Now, I did not want my birthday to end like a normal day. I wanted to sustain the feeling in me that I was born 20 years back on the same day. So to wish myself a wonderful birthday and wishful life ahead I decided to do something for me.
I made a birthday card for myself.
I wrote a letter to myself to keep me strong and hopeful towards the life ahead.
(There are too much personal stuffs in the letter, sorry for the trim!)
I made a playlist of fresh new songs to hear from today onwards. (List coming soon as ‘My favourite Playlist post!)
I planted few seeds in the Vegetable garden.
I will be making payasam (Vermicelli desert) tonight for my family and will be watching some horror movie in the night just as If I’m watching it in a theatre all alone!
I feel now that, it’s fun to have time for you on everyday rather than choosing a special day. It’s okay if you are introvert (which I am not but circumstances does not allow me to go social), it’s okay if you are living far away from your family and friends just give yourself everything. Only you are strong enough to keep yourself happy. Whatever is the situation, the bad days are going to go and good days shall arrive soon.